Dealing with Disabilities and Depression

I was reading one of my fellow bloggers and she made think about my past experiences as she is experiencing so I want to repeat what I wrote.

I am hard of hearing (completely deaf when not wearing hearing-aids) so I was able to hear almost "normal" and I am thankful for today's technologies. I am always self-conscience about revealing my hearing-aids so grew my hair long enough to cover them. They are behind the ears type. I don't want people to know I am hard of hearing that I am able to live normal as they can. There are times (at work), I have to let some people know that I am unable to hear and they need to speak up which I HATE doing this.

Last week, my wife encouraged me to get my hair SHORT and reveal my hearing aids. I resisted her recommendations for a long time. Finally, I gave in and tested it. So far most people don't even notice them. Now, I am not as self-concsience as I used to be. Only certain people knows about my MS and only selected people knows about my depression events.

Its not easy to talk about my depression which is why I am glad to join the men's group. All men mentioned their experiences with depression which made me felt good since I am not alone in that department. When I am dealing with my own depression, I am reminded of Christ's definition of Beatitudes (happiness listed in Matthew 5) contradicts flesh's definition of happiness. Its not about whether I am happy or sad but rather, its about whether I am spiritually happy by being faithful to God regardless my situation. We all to apply our faith through the Holy Spirit in our own life in order to live in this life. Since Adam and Eve, we all were born with one or more defects that are commonly known as S-I-N, as it is primarily symptomized by loss of moral judgment. I love this illustration that I got this a long time ago and I love it. This might help.

Recall Notice (This is like a parable to those who understand computers. I thought this is interesting)

The maker of all human beings is recalling all units manufactured, regardless of make or year, due to the serious defect in the primary and central component of the heart. This is due to a malfunction in the original prototype units code named Adam and Eve, resulting in the reproduction of the same defect in all subsequent units. This defect has been technically termed, 'Subsequential Internal Non Morality,' or more commonly known as S-I-N, as it is primarily symptomized by loss of moral judgment.

Some of the typical symptoms:
(a) Loss of direction (All of us are born spiritual ignorant, not stupid. Through Adam, we are born spiritually dead. The nineteenth-century Scottish commentator John Eadie described it as a case of "death walking". Spiritually dead people are like zombies--they don't know they're dead and they're still going through the motions of living.)
(b) Foul vocal emissions
(c) Amnesia of origin
(d) Lack of peace and joy
(e) Selfish, or violent, behavior
(f) Depression or confusion in the mental component
(g) Fearful
(h) Idolatry

The manufacturer, who is neither liable or at fault for this defect, providing factory authorized repair and service, free charge to correct this SIN defect. The number to call for the recall station in your area is: P-R-A-Y-E-R.

Once connected, please upload your burden of SIN by Pressing R-E-P-E-N-T-A-N-C-E.

Next, download J-E-S-U-S into your life.

No matter how big or small the SIN defect is, JESUS repair will replace it with:
(a) Love
(b) Joy
(c) Peace
(d) Longsuffering
(e) Gentleness
(f) Goodness
(g) Faith
(h) Meekness
(i) Temperance

Please see operating manual which is the Holy Bible, for further details on the use of these fixes.

WARNING: Continuing to operate the human unit without correction, voids the manufacturer's warranty, exposing owner to dangers and problems too numerous to list and will result in the human unit being permanently impounded.

For free emergency service, call on J-E-S-U-S.

DANGER: The human units not receiving this recall action will have to be scraped in the furnace. The SIN defect must not enter heaven or else heaven will be infected.

Authorized by: The Creator (God).

I want to repeat what I wrote about God's Grace in my previous posts. The Greek word for "dwells" is okv (oike), which means "I inhabit." "If Christ is in us, though the body is dead because of sin, yet the spirit is alive because of righteousness" (Romans 8:10). "My temorary body is decaying at the same time, my inner being is being renewed day by day" (2 Cor 4:16). It is God's will that we submit to the Holy Spirit and keep on filling (Ephesians 5:18). Like an athlete when training, we should always keep drinking water so that we won't be dehydrated and feeling weak. With that thought in mind, we should always keep filling the Holy Spirit so that we are able to act and react any given situations. "My grace is sufficient for you, for power is made perfect in weakness." (2 Cor. 12:9).

God Bless the U.S.A. by Lee Greenwood

Beatiful Song and Video about Jesus

Sweet Surrender

Another favorite of mine that I often drift into wonderful dreams while listening. John had alot of meaning within his lyrics. Listen and dream. :)

My thoughts why I like having a men's support group

There are many MS support groups that both men and women share their experiences however women often are able to have their own "social" gathering with other women while men often can't. Typically because most MS patients are women and often I see at least 1 to 3 men in support groups and that women often outnumber men in over-all support groups. I do believe men should be able to bond together and develop friendship. My wife is very supportive in all aspect of my disabilities however she said she is unable to help me in certain areas of my mental and emotional distress that only men can relate. One of the best ways to combat the mental and emotional distress is to be part of a men's support group that "peer to peer" help in a caring atmosphere. To me, in my own thoughts, I would like to see a sense of community that is not found anywhere else that we can exchange practical tips and share experiences and feelings that men can only understand. A safe place to talk openly about problems and feelings and to have a simple social interaction that will reduce feelings of isolation. I hope to play golf with some of them (I am not sure if any of them play golf).

Living with Multiple Sclerosis, I am prone to live with chronic pain. Most of the time, I am managing my chronic pain and just learn to listen to my body. There are times that my chronic pain can be very uncomfortable. The most common pain I face is spasticity which basically feelings of stiffness and a wide range of involuntary muscle spasms. I often experience is often the feeling of tightness of muscles and sometimes painful spasms, usually of the legs and my back. Other issues I face with MS are: fatique, dizziness, feet spasms, swallowing (once in awhile), and numbness/tingling. Most of my relapse are associated with dizziness, fatique and spasms.

One topic of a "sensitive" topic would be sex. Multiple sclerosis affects woman more than men. For majority of both men and women with MS suffer from at least 1 symptom of sexual dysfunction. Men deals with impotence which hurts their ego. For me, which I think this a common problem for men is spasticity. The muscles in our bodies spasm painfully, without warning. Sometimes spasticity causes impotence due to lack of desire. Mostly up my legs and sometimes my back. Most of the time, I am thankful that I hardly had that issues but there were times, I did. Other times due to medications and/or psychological reasons, I had problem with impotence. I am able to perform most of the time (thankfully). Emotional health is an important part of overall health because living with a disability can make coping with everyday life even harder.

My next step is finding a church with "Men with Disabilities" group.

An Blog I was reading............

This morning, I was reading another blogger which I visit daily and saw her link to another blog she updates in "Coffee Spills" talking about The arrogance of power and got my mind provoked with a long comment.

I am careful about this in my own life because my flesh can grow bolder and arrogant of self-centered rather than Christ-centered. How am I REALLY serving Christ?

"Show me, O LORD, my life's end and the number of my days; let me know how fleeting is my life."—Psalm 39:4

This is my own "self-examination" regarding my relationship with God because "personal interest" is the motive behind all conducts that foolish decisions and proudful. How can I distinguish my motives?

It is a grave responsibility when we take upon ourselves when we seek to edit out of God's true character for the benefits of ourselves. As Christians, our hearts should have holy motives to serve God through the Holy Spirit.

I love this quote by A.W. Tozer:
"The carnal approach usually does little more than to alienate the enemy still further from us and, worse than all, it puts us in a position where God cannot help us. The enemy never quite knows how to deal with a humble man; he is so used to dealing with proud, stubborn people that a meek man upsets his timetable. And furthermore, the man of true humility has God fighting on his side--who can win against God?"

It's been jokingly said, "I love Christians but it's their attitude I can't stand." Christians continue to manifest childish behavior instead of growing to spiritual adulthood is a sign of spiritual weakness. They often ignore the sanctifying effects of the cross carrying and skip the Spiritual training which is necessary for forming spiritual fruits that are needed to wrestle against the world, the devil and the flesh. In 1 Corinthians 13:5 says "Love does not act unbecomingly"

Satan's first sin is pride, then the real source is PRIDE. If we desire honor and glory from God, we must display humility first. That is contrary to our earthly philosophy, which exalts pride. God gives his grace only to the humble, who admit their dependence on it. If, therefore, we hope for his grace to lift us up to holiness, we must "humble (ourselves) before the Lord" (Jas 4:10). The Greek word alazoneia refers to being proud when you really have nothing to be proud about. We live in a proud and egotistical generation. "God opposes the proud but gives grace to the humble" (Jas 4:6, quoting Pr 3:34). God's grace is amply sufficient to enable us to live a godly life that God gives his grace only to the humble, who admit their dependence on it. If, therefore, we hope for his grace to lift us up to holiness, we must "humble before the Lord" in faith.

Thank you for reminding me and I am going to share this blog post in my blog tonight with others. This is a good blog today.

Jim

Men with MS Group

We had our first meeting and it was a success. Eleven (11) men showed up and there's more but they were unable to attend. We were forced to leave the meeting room since another group was waiting for the room. We are going to meet once a month and make sure we reserve a room long enough so we can stay longer.

The men were great and funny. I will explain more later.

Jim

Mind-body Medicine

Tonight, I will be attending the first meeting of a new group that is for "Men with MS". I have been thinking and wonder who the men are and what they would be like. I do hope they will have positive attitude about their life. I want to be involved with group of men who have something in common and hopefully we can have a social life together and develop meaningful friendship. Most of all, I hope they also have positive attitude about life and their MS. Heck, I sure hope some of them love to play golf. I missed playing golf.

I have seen that there are literally thousands of articles on how the mind and brain affect the body. When a person can focus on something other than their own illness, this allows the body to take advantage of our own healing capacity. Accepting may be the most important step toward finding success and happiness by focusing on the term “All disabilities or weaknesses are part of life’s challenges". We need to be self-aware by using our ability to accept the existence of our weaknesses and identify our strengths and weaknesses rather than dwell solely on the negative aspects of our weaknesses.

A positive attitude is often key to a successful life and sometimes we fall into the bad habit of negativity. I have a positive attitude, and I am optimistic about my future. Whenever I find myself not being positive, I try to put into perspective how fortunate I truly am, and usually what I'm upset about ends up looking pretty trivial. Whenever my positive attitude gets deflated, I get depressed. In order to have positive attitudes, I have to learn to “respect my bad habits." Habits don't develop in a vacuum. Without understanding the value of my habit, I will never consider methods for replacing them with something easier to adapt with. So therefore, rather than “beating” my habits, I need to understand that my habits are my “weaknesses”. I view weaknesses as disabilities. Those with disabilities have learned to accept and adapt life with their own weaknesses and therefore, we can learn from them.

The right perspective is to understand that in the trouble of life this is part of it trying to discern what God is doing in the trouble of it. James says count it all joy when you fall into various trials cause trials have a perfecting work. Peter says after you've suffered a while the Lord will make you perfect. God uses suffering to reveal our spiritual condition. If I keep forgetting the basic meanings of God's grace, I would become a bitter, angry, and cantankerous person just because things are not going "my way". Trials come to us to reveal what we really dwell on. I have to remember that no one else can take responsibility for my private life. Health is mental, emotional, physical, and spiritual wholeness which health is a gift from God, but I am responsible alone to create a proper attitude. Grace teaches me that I am to continue to rejoice and praise God even in the midst of my trials and suffering in this earthly life! Trials come to test the strength of our faith because they assist us in the knowledge of our own faith to cope with our daily lives. (Genesis 22:1-18, Malachi 3:3-4, 1 Peter 1:6-9).

My Most Memorable Carole Burnett Show Scene

Carol Burnett Show outtakes - Tim Conway's Elephant Story


If you want a GOOD LAUGH, please watch this and I am so sure that you will laugh. I did everytime I watch this.

Another Favorite Song by The Carpenters...

One of my favorite singers and songs.......

Play the video and listing to this song as you read this. This song is called "We will Glorify". This song was played in my wedding November 28, 2003 at my parents' house in Massachusetts.

Twila Paris is another Christian who is listed in my personal Hall of Faith. I first saw her in concert about 20 years ago (I think) and fell in love with her music and songs. love Twila's music because most of them are focused on worship. At our wedding (our second marriage), we played "We will Glorify", written. It was the most beautiful song for our wedding. We both want to glorify God with our marriage and we are glorifying wonderfully. God is with us and we both are spiritually and emotionally.

Winner of the Gospel Music Association's 1993 and 1994 Dove Award for Female Vocalist of the Year. Known for years as "the modern-day hymnwriter," Twila has been compared to the legendary Fanny Crosby for her powerful contributions to contemporary hymnody. Songs like "We Will Glorify," "Lamb of God," "How Beautiful," and "Faithful Men" have been recognized as significant by virtue of their inclusion in millions of hymnals in churches around the world.

We will glorify the King of kings
We will glorify the Lamb
We will glorify the Lord of lords Who is the great I AM
Lord Jehovah reigns in majesty
We will bow before His throne
We will worship Him in righteousness
We will worship Him alone He is Lord of heaven,
Lord of earth He is Lord of all who live
He is Lord above the universe
All praise to Him we give Hallelujah to the King of kings Hallelujah to the Lamb Hallelujah to the Lord of Lords
Who is the great I AM

Feeling Stronger Everyday.......... (Play this so you can read while listening)

When I was growing up, Chicago was one of my favorite groups and had most of their albums. This is one of my favorite songs and I love listening to this whenever I get the chance. When younger, I didn't understand the words and we didn't have resources to get the lyrics. Now I can see the lyrics and can understand better.

Feelin' Stronger Everyday (Chicago)
I do believe in you
And I know you believe in me
Oh yeah
Oh yeah

And now we realize
Love's not all that it's supposed to be
Oh yeah
Oh yeah

And knowing that you would have wanted it this way
I do believe I'm feelin' stronger every day

I know we really tried
Together we had a love inside
Oh yeah
Oh yeah

So now the time has come
For both of us to live on the run
Oh yeah
Oh yeah

And knowing that you would have wanted it this way
I do believe I'm feelin' stronger every day
Yeah, yeah, yeah

After what you've meant to me
Ooh baby now
I can make it easily
Yeah, yeah, yeah
I know that we both agree
The best thing to happen to you
Is the best thing that happened to me
Yeah, yeah, yeah

Feelin' stronger every day
Feelin' stronger every day
Feelin' stronger every day
(You know I'm alright now)
Feelin' stronger every day
(You know I'm alright now)
Feelin' stronger every day
(You know I'm alright now)
Feelin' stronger every day
(You know I'm alright now)
Feelin' stronger every day
(You know I'm alright now)
Feelin' stronger every day
(You know I'm alright now)
Feelin' stronger every day
(You know I'm alright now)
Feelin' stronger every day
(You know I'm alright now)

I'm not cured by any means but I am feeling much stronger spiritually strong and learning to grow through my human weaknesses. Back during the days of Adam, Noah and others in the book of Genesis, they were living too long; so long that they didn’t appreciate their mortality. Most of them lived between 600 and 969 years. The Bible says that the world was a better place before the Flood, and that people back then lived much longer than we do. The Bible documents the long lifetimes of people before the Flood, and the progressively shorter lifetimes of people after the Flood. The clear message of the Bible is that life on earth was very different from now.

After 100 years of building, he finished. Noah was 500 years old when he started building the boat. God send the animals and Noah was penning them up as they were showing up at the Ark. Rain was not part of the pre-Flood ecology. Something radical must have happened to disrupt the environment and rain clouds came. Noah had the opportunity to share the Lord's warnings and invite people to be saved however none of Noah's friends and neighbors were aboard the Ark. So, why didn't they come? Because, the problem was sin because they love it while God hates it. God love everything that He has created but He hated what Satan has corrupted.

Today, even if people avoid all fatal diseases, humans will generally die of old age before they reach much past 100. Even the very exceptional cases don’t make it much past 120 years. Looking at the drop in lifespans after the Flood, it is natural to think that it must be related to the world having changed so drastically. Since then, continuing decline, lasting for centuries that Isaac lived to 180, Moses 120, King David only 71 years.

Why? Creationists are saying genetic loss and harmful mutations were the reason for the decline in lifespans. Scholars and Pastors are translating those meanings to "sin". Our earthly body is susceptible to decay (corruption) that in whatever ways our appearance or health has been altered as a result of sin in which we inherited from Adam (Romans 5:12). A Christian believer with an "inner man", like all believers who are still physically alive, possesses a mortal body which deteriorates daily eternal life, who will eventually set free from their sin-contaminated, decaying fleshly bodies with with new, immortal, perfect ones with righteous natures (I Cor 15:50-54). Christ gave us a different kind warning which is the same but different from Noah's warnings. Jesus is saying that He cannot do our repenting for us. He died for our sins, now it is up to us to pick up the cross.

When a Christian who is saved by the conviction of the Holy Spirit, this Christian is living in a new Creature with holy conscience rather than sinful conscience. As a Christian, I still can have sinful desires, foolish desires, proud desires and at the same time, have godly desires. I know I will never be perfect as long as I live in my sinful body which is why David is my role model, who was never perfect but God announced that David was always after God's heart. God hates sin and David knew that. My concience is what I follow. Learning from David's experiences, God meets us in our heart rather than our mind therefore we need to focus on the "heart of the matter". "David son of Jesse is a man after my own heart, for he will do everything I want him to do." Acts 13:22 & 1 Samuel 13:14 (NLT). Learning from David, I have learned that God loves but He also hates. Psalm 97:10 "Ye who love the LORD, hate evil." Reading Psalms, I have learned that David used six synonyms to describe Scripture: law, testimony, precepts, commandment, fear, and judgments.

We will never be perfect but we can be filled. The Greek word for "dwells" is okv (oike), which means "I inhabit." "If Christ is in us, though the body is dead because of sin, yet the spirit is alive because of righteousness" (Romans 8:10). "My temorary body is decaying at the same time, my inner being is being renewed day by day" (2 Cor 4:16). It is God's will that we submit to the Holy Spirit and keep on filling (Ephesians 5:18). Like an athlete when training, we should always keep drinking water so that we won't be dehydrated and feeling weak. With that thought in mind, we should always keep filling the Holy Spirit so that we are able to act and react any given situations. "My grace is sufficient for you, for power is made perfect in weakness." (2 Cor. 12:9).

Commentaries relating to "Death Penalty"

USA's Commentary: The punishment fits the times "three important cases before the Supreme Court, the country is once again grappling with the death penalty." Politicians and citizens alike are debating how and whether we should execute those who kill others.

I like this letter to the editor (Columbus Dispatch) titled "Make punishment as cruel as crime" (Monday, January 14,2008).

I respond to the Tuesday Dispatch article "Lethal injection: the most-humane way?" in which the Supreme Court is reported to be contemplating whether that method of execution is cruel or unusual punishment. The case, as I understand it, deals with two convicted murderers in Kentucky who shot two law-enforcement officers while they were trying to serve arrest warrants.

I was suddenly struck with the idea: Wouldn't it be fair to impose the same punishment on the perpetrators as they imposed on their victim(s)? Would it be cruel to carry out a death sentence utilizing the same method as the victim suffered?

These officers had no right of appeal or any chance to plead the case before their peers.

DAVID WILL , Galloway, Ohio

Not long ago, I had a long post about my thoughts relating to this topic here: Controversial: Capital Punishment Also, I have discovered that most Libertarians are against Death Penalty simply because they don't trust the government.

You can study more about this pros and cons at this site: Death Penalty Organizations & Sites, Pro & Con

I have learned that

majority of Libertarians do not trust the government to make decisions which makes me think that I should remain "independent" for the time being. I will still keep researching.

Why am I saying this?

I believe that we are called to render service and obedience as to submit to civil authority (1 Pet. 2:13–17 ; Matt. 22:21) even when they are run by sinners because the Government is God-ordained. Even when government leaders are bad (sinners)? Good example is Pharaoh. Satan have been using Pharaoh to persecute Jewish people for years. In Exodus 9:16 "But I (God) have raised you (Pharaoh) up for this very purpose, that I might show you my power and that my name might be proclaimed in all the earth." Paul confirmed this in Romans 9:17 "For the Scripture says to Pharaoh: 'I raised you up for this very purpose, that I might display my power in you and that my name might be proclaimed in all the earth.' I have faith in God more than I have faith in any of our man-lead systems because God governs (controls) the world (Isa. 40:22-24), the nations (Isa. 40:15-17), and us (Proverbs 16:9).

So, I don't want to go against God because whoever is against the Government, is against God. The only time I will rebel against my government is when my Government force me to make decisions that is against God's will. On example is in Acts 5, Peter responded to Sanhedrin, the high priest that "We must obey God rather than men!" The only time Christians can violate God's government is when a Christian is asked to disobey God. You can read many Bible characters including Daniel disobey the Government out of principle rather than simple disobience.

Patriots to honor young fan booed in Indianapolis

Patriots owner Robert Kraft sat behind his wide desk and marveled at how his team's jersey could be the target of so many boos -- even when it's worn by a 14-year-old girl. Read the rest of the story

By the way, I grew up in New England when I was growing up so I am a Boston/New England Fan.

I love:
Boston Red Sox
Boston Bruins
Boston Celtics
New England Patriots